husband drunk when i went into labor husband drunk when i went into labor

26 years of marriage has taught me to make sure she is comfortable and has what she needs first and to be honest about what I need. Once labor begins, it can take between 10 to 24 hours (or more) to progress through the three stages of labor before your baby is born. His father had to leave the room because he felt like he was going to throw up.saying It looks like hamburger meat. Holy fuuk. When one starts living with a functioning alcoholic husband, they try to take control of situations, as mentioned above, and behave as a counselor. After 26 hours of Oxytocin induced labour our son arrived and my hubby had the balls to say jokingly Well, at least we know hes hers! There was never any doubt about paternity, it was just his stupid sense of humour. If you want to read all 237 responses (and YOU DO), click here. Andhe bowled the only perfect game of his entire life! My hubby has a habit of drinking a lot (over 5 drinks in an evening) after a rough day at work, and I'm worried I'll go into labor, and he'll be extremely buzzed. You should also make sure to spend quality time with each other and remind yourselves why you fell in love in the first place. Hours in labor: Never went into labor! One of the major issues that you, as the wife of an alcoholic husband, may face is awkward situations in public or family gatherings. My husband got into an argument with a nurse and almost got himself kicked out of the hospital. Try to apeal to the protector in him and let him know how much you need him there. Now, no matter how many babies you have given birth to, you still never quite remember the feeling of going into labour until it actually happens again. I also worry about his habit when the baby comes, if he needs to unwind now it's going to get a lot worse when the baby is around as far as stress level goes. Well, setting up limits for them. My husband said that I should be more in pain, but I convinced him that we should still go to the hospital to get it checked, and that the worst thing that could happen was to get sent home. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action. She never left my side, fed me frozen Gatorade chips for hours, and knew exactly what to do(and by the way, shes never been pregnant and never wanted to be.). This is why it is important for you to encourage him to seek professional help for alcohol addiction treatment if he seems hesitant to do so. "With . Yep, I was 8.5 cm when we checked in to the hospital). Then I asked him to wake our 3-year-old and get him ready for daycare. Needless to say, I snapped but couldnt yell at him in fear of waking up my sister (our babysitter) and our 2-year old. Reach out to rescue them only when they seek out help. This post and the responses make me want to bash my head against a wall. -Lois, I was fully dilated after 18 hours and my husband said you think you can hold out pushing until I grab some breakfast?-Sarah, My husband grew this ridiculous goatee and wore a shirt that said TOERAG on it, so he looks ridiculous in all the photos. -Stephanie, My husband started throwing up while I was pushing. So say he is out for a work meeting until 6, and he had 2 glasses of wine. Delivery type: Vaginal that progressed to C-section. In some cases, there are no signs. husband drunk when i went into labor. My contractions are 1-2 min apart at this point. But still no medal. Good grief you have issues. The nurses were advising and waiting on him. The following morning my husband went home to get his sugar meter (he is diabetic) that he forgot. My husband decided the ideal time to invite his parents into the labor & delivery room was when I was laying spread eagle, everything out for the world to see, being stitched up by the doctor after our son was born. Your husband has to submit to you during your childbirth becauae you are the patient and you will be exposed. Doctor goes into labor while delivering patient's baby Someone needs to tell them it is not helpful to say things likeHere we go. and This looks like a big one.. . Yes, keep telling her that labor will sober him right up, and that he has to sit in the waiting room if he is buzzed, because that's totally the right answer. Indeed! Haha Im going to have to share these stories with my boyfriend so he knows not to mess up next time. Who knows..just having a baby may wake him up and realize that there are more important things to stay sober for. Out of all the natural ways to induce labor at home, nipple stimulation is one of the most reliable options. I mean PISSED. Every birthday growing up I heard about the stupid thing my Dad did when I was born. It can vary widely. And never forgot it. Some places test moms for COVID-19 at 36 to 38 weeks or before they undergo a C-section, while others don't test at all or do it when a case of the virus is suspected. At 7 am, doctor broke my water. I understand your concern about getting to the hospital when you're in labor, but have you considered the bigger picture? Last week, I made a simple request on the Mommy Shorts fanpage. Don't take anything personally. I don't know what kind of birth you're planning, but the Bradley books (Husband-Coached Childbirth and Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way, IIRC) are very insistent on how important it is that the husband be there to support, etc. Little do they know. As soon as they moved me into the rooms near the nursery, he went home because he was tired and me being in labor kept him up all night. If he won't deal with that, you should. I was sleeping when suddenly cramped stood up and my water broke. I made breakfast. I had a hellish time trying to breastfeed my newborn son (turns out he had a tongue thrust issue and didnt latch on until he was 5 weeks old ) and in the middle of the hospital room, amidst lactation consultants and even a sucking specialist , my husband announces : Honey, let me show you, this is how you do it. Frankly this scares me. I dont remember anything I said or did after that. When I woke up after the operation, the nurses unceremoniously kicked me out, but because I didnt have a cellphone, I couldnt call him and I didnt have my own transport. The *only* reason I left the room when she was in labor was to go to the bathroom. He ran away because he said he had business at work he had to attend to. Suffer. To his credit, he sprung out of bed, I rang my best friend and she came to look after Maddie and Sam. She thought she had just peed her pants, but it kept happening everytime she stood upso off we went to the hospital, and she was definately in labor. The tendency to hide their problems is also a common characteristic among alcoholics. Wow, after reading all of this, I swear my DH is a god among men! And that I hadnt eaten dinner and was starving. husband drunk when i went into labor - bestetica.online After Amy Lam prematurely went into labor and gave birth to their baby at home, her husband, Gilbert Kwok, thought the worst was over. When you sent the call out, you said husbands, and I totally forgot what my dad did the night I was born. Related Reading: 15 Ways How to Have Self-Control in a Relationship. If you are having symptoms of preterm labor, call your healthcare provider right away. Life with an alcoholic husband is tough. Not only is he really annoying when buzzed, which will piss me off and make my pain and anxiety higher, but he can't drive! The next morning, I rationally explained to him that if I would have gone into labor (I was 38 weeks at that point) I would not have allowed him into the l and d room. This has nothing to do with "men being stupid". 7 Natural Ways to Induce Labor - Healthline My husband was trying to time my contractions to see when we should go to the hospital. -Carrie, After I finally agreed to an epidural, the nurse explained that it would feel like a quick little bee sting. At the hospital he asked over and over If he could leave to go get himself dinner. If that doesn't work,I have two thoughts. He almost passed out and had his own team of nurses and MY midwife helping him. Her husband waited nearby but outside the birthing room. This happened a few times until I fit woke him up to tell him it was time to go to the hospital. The ban has since been lifted: Following an outcry from expectant parents, medical professionals, and doulas, Governor Cuomo signed an executive order on March 28 requiring all New York hospitals to allow one person to accompany someone who is pregnant through labor and delivery. My husband was behind me holding me up while I squatted when a nurse looked at him funny and said You dont look so hot. Raspberry Leaf Tea. According to the World Health Organisation, around 2% of adults globally have a drinking problem thats over one billion people! In the car, everything was very annoying to me: the radio, the sound of my husband at the time talking on the phone, just everything. Pleaseselect whether I bother you once a day or once a week. Sis takes me to the hospital and gets hold of husband. You can also ask them any questions you may have and share your experiences with them. First baby: Yes. Honestly more hurt that thats more important, then it is funny! What on earth makes you think anyone wants your man? If your husband is an alcoholic, make every effort to avoid situations that are triggers for drinking. After 15 hours of back labor and a placental abruption, mine thought it would be cute to say, Honey, calm down! Karma soon gave him kidney stones afterwards. Luckily, I had the exact opposite experience . I had trauma to the right side of my abdomen and hip area, have muscle spasms in the regular to this day, five years later, and my incision looks crazy. Know your own limitations. You may be in active labor if your contractions happen at least every 5 minutes, last for 1 minute each, and have been . Supporting a woman in labor is an incredibly exciting and important role. **They're called first luddz fo' a reason -- mo' is supposed ta come after. Either way, the amniotic sac surrounding the baby has broken, and your kid is on the way. You are pregnant, not we are pregnant. I guess I had it pretty good! I COULDNT actually talk. Needless to say, when, four weeks later he was resting a pack of frozen peas on his testicles from the vasectomy hed breezily put his hand up for, my sympathy levels were small to non-existent. Seriously, OP, the issues surrounding labour should be amongst the least of your concerns here. Pregnant . Water Breaking Is a (Damn Obvious) Sign of Labor. I would also say that 5+ drinks make a person more than "buzzed." Prodromal Labor | Contractions That Start & Stop - Trimester Talk While bringing the note over they saw his truck and had to go bang on our bedroom window to wake my stupid husband up. He called the hospital and they said theyd call him as soon as anything happened. In the worst case, you would also want to avoid the situation as much as you can. Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. My brother and father arrived at around 10pm and my brother volunteers to go out and get some food for my husband. While crawling along, my contractions got closer together and longer. All they could do was pace the floor in the waiting room. You would really benefit from an Al-Anon meeting or two. At first he acted like I was over reacting but later apologized and agreed with me. I wouldnt have had more babys with a guy who could care less that I was having the first.. How could you have any more kids with someone after that are u crazy. Second, that is way to much drinking for a regular basis. Then 14 hours and a baby boy later, he called to let everyone at the office (a family business) know the good news. If men only knew how much pain and exhaustion really goes into labor. my best and held out until about 6am. Its just like this all the things men do wrong only it was just one man, My man, so dont nobody try to take him! I wish you luckI would talk to him now about this habit! That's why it's important to do the things that make you happy, such as hobbies, movies, great food - whatever floats your boat. Children should be seen, and heard, and believed. He took one too many wrong turns and we ended up in a dodgy end of town. I had a go-bag ready with food, water and phone numbers. I mean you did what she asked, right??? He was about 4 minutes from the hospital but after 20 minutes he stillhadnt shown up. I'll talk to him tomorrow. With our second things went pretty well. He needed to get directions to the hospital. My informal plan was to attempt medication-free vaginal . Women need to put their foot down. Woodward said the labor was moving fast and about 15 minutes later, the baby had arrived, even before paramedics had arrived on the scene. When I kicked it off and yelled at him to get whatever was touching me off, he responded with its just a magazine. I'm all about unwinding with some drinks and depends on if its hard drinks or just 5 beers. It really hurts. I replied, What the fuck is wrong with you? He will not only miss the labor, but likely years of your child's life due to alcohol related disability or death. Some women experience other symptoms of labor with a bloody show: Cramping: You may feel period-like cramps that come and go over the course of hours or even days. You need to have a serious talk with your DH. And yes, I actually fix my hair. Look at some of the comments and then talk about stupid. I hardly knew my now husband of 11 years at the time (though I already knew he was the one!) I like the suggestion that if he's buzzed, he's not invited into the delivery room, and HE has to call his folks to explain why THEY need to drive me to the hospital. The worst part was later when he said, You know, you seemed kind of mad that I got sick. Yeah, sorry I couldnt be sympathetic. First is, do you have a backup person who can be there for you? Not sure of this counts but after I had the baby I realized I forgot to pack underware so I told my husband to bring me a pair. It scream youth and ignorance. Seriously?? 28 Examples of Crap Husbands Pull While Their Wives are in Labor. Birthing partner 101: Advice for partners and dads during labor he replied no it didnt and rolled over to try and go back to sleep. 7 min read. Then he gets home and wants a couple more glasses of wine. Mines more funny than bad: I went to the hospital 7 weeks early and had an emergency c-section because of HELLP syndrome. I woke up at 2:30 to contractions. Lydia and her husband Steven Reece, 40, from Winston . When I was born my Dad was on a fishing trip. That's awesome! Mum had gone in to hospital and he was working. Yeah. He went back to sleep. I was laying on the bed playing And E was sitting in my desk chair. He was much better with our sons birth though even cleaned up after me when I puked in the basin I still hold that first time against him though! She told him and he freaked out, made himself puke (totally tmi) and then was a paranoid mess the whole drive to the hospital. He then moved to the toilet to puke some more before I yelled at him that hed better get the hell out of there because I needed it NOW. (More on my adorable new nephew later this week.). You know, the stuff you still hold over his head. With our third, he asked me to stretch out the pushing for 55 minutes so he would win the money pot at work. He told the registering nurse, my room nurse, my midwife, my doula, ANYONE who had ears our WHOLE life story. With my second I was in labor through the night, his dad kept asking if he could go home to sleep because I didnt need him there, he missed his bed and the hospital staff was disrupting his sleep. Im shaking because of the epidural so I get no sleep, and hes snoring and well fed. I mean he would have just stayed home and played video games, if I had given him the impression that Ill be okay on my own. laughing gas has been used as a form of pain relief since the late 1900's, although you're more likely to see it at the dentist's office than a birth center. Bud Grace And Frankie Weight Gain . He arrived at the hospital with an emerald ring to give her..because after all, it was Mothers Day, and I was born in May. Two days later, he picked us up from the hospital and wanted me to make eggplant parmesan from scratch cause we had a new oven. DH drinks at night, I'm worried I'll go into labor and he - The Bump Ask Amy: Husband's nightly drinking takes its toll on - oregonlive As soon as the dr left, I yelled at my hubby to get up and he acted offended! I was also in the middle of a contraction when he said that. When my contractions were less than 2mins apart, I told my husband we needed to leave. This behavior will shorten his lifespan, increase his odds of developing certain types of cancers, raise his weight, sap his energy, and generally make things miserable. He begrudgingly told me hed hurry. "When I [give] with just with my doula and midwife alone, I can allow myself to do whatever is needed to get the baby out," she says. For the rest of her births, she delivered at home with midwives. Luckily, my own husband was a peach! It was 4am when I decided to wake up my husband (this was 2 hours after dealing with the labor on my own) and I told him its getting so much stronger now. So I went about my day normally and really thought something was going on around 3pm. My husband was asleep in the chair and when they woke him up, he walked over to me and said, My foot hurts. REALLY? I know what it feels like! I tell her I need to go home. Miscarriage @ 6w3d in December 2009. http://s9.photobucket.com/albums/a71/heysupnatalie/?action=view. Oh, yeah, I am sure he will slow it down. this is fantastic!! Are there any good books for hubby that explain the importance of truly supporting the wife? Woman Had Husband Murdered While She Was In Labor With His Best Friend's Baby. AND, it is your child too, not just his. He works, he goes out with friends, and when OP asks him to be around or spend more time with her, he tells her to get her own friends. Not saying you aren't important to him..I'm sure you mean the world to him but having a child is a whole new/different kind of love that might just make him realize the drinking like he does needs to slow down. Okay. The day after our daughter was born my husband told me about this whole situation and directly quoted said I mean I had to pump for 2 minutes straight. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. We got to the hospital at 5 pm. Medicated: Yes. I am not saying what your DH is doing is right, in fact, I think 5 drinks every night is a bit heavy and you should talk to him about it. Van Jefferson, Wife Samaria Welcome Second Baby Mid-Super Bowl - Peoplemag I HAVE to join in here. Of course, I ended up delivering at 230 AM and when I asked for something to eat, the doctor told me Id have to wait until the cafeteria opened. He finally comes back as I was about to go investigate (and by investigate, I mean cause bodily harm) and explained that he had food stuck in his teeth so he had been trying to floss it out!!!!!! To this day I cant even enjoy an episode of Duck Dynasty without wanting to smother him. I sincerely wish you luck this will not be an easy road, but I hope you both find the strength you need for the sake of your baby. My brother gets a Popeyes meal for my husband and tries to eat it in the hospital room with me. -Angelia, My husband went downstairs to charge his phone and call his mom from the car. I called him to come home and he suggested id feel better walking up and down the street. My nurse thought he had the flu. Awww come on, suck it up. Unless yo ass is imoan. Finally after I frantically run around the church for a few mins he calls back in which I tell him get all our pre packed bags and carseat ready to go Im on my way home she is in labor, we lived 4 hours from the birthmom. Unfortunately, the emerald fell out when I was in middle school so I bought a new one to replace it. Sept. 28, 2016. So I called him to tell him to hurry and get there. I don't know if this has impacted on the way I hold my emotions, but I tend to really bottle everything up until it all becomes too much - even then though it's VERY difficult to communicate any angst or anything that's bothering me. ! was my reply in the softest angry voice I could mutter. Im late to the party but here is a story for you He said he needed to shower and run a couple of errands and get some lunch. I think he needs a friend intervention - sounds like he would not listen to you. With my 2nd son, he kept watching the monitor and telling me when I was having a contraction. Labor Story #8: The waiting game (41 weeks / vaginal to C-section) Location: Alexandria, Va. Year: 2013. I Tested Positive for COVID-19 During Labor Here's What - Parents At 2am I finally was in some relief from my epidural and was hoping to MAYBE take a nap before go time. Jaime Clark didn't feel contractions with her first baby, either. This is the best Ive got: I'm so sorry that you are going through this, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Baby. It's not much to ask for him to give up drinking for a couple of weeks or to just tone it down to a couple just in case so that he can still drive ina pinch. I gave birth to our baby in our house on our bed till i was discovered by his fifteen year old niece. Legend: Wife Seduces Husband at Halloween Party but He Switched So my dad went bowling. SEARCH PARTIES. However, this might not be a good decision, ever. My Husband is a Drunk. And I don't know how, why or when it | by But, in the long run, the denial mode is not going to work at all. My husband and I were so excited that we jumped right into action. I dont know why I remember things like that. -Carrie, My husband rested the magazine he was reading on my legs while I lay dying WITHOUT an epidural. He is trying to lose some weight before the LO gets here. Remember, youre not to be blamed for their habit. I feel so much resentment for his lack of physical and emotional support. Copyright 2009-2023 Creative Skirt, LLC. Epidurals are the pain relief of choice in the U.S. but that may be changing. Camera. Madeline Harding. Thats when the smell of a thousand beers hit me. (this part was planned, hospital rule, only 2 in the delivery room besides the mom- so her mom and I attended) I was mentally exhausted by the time the baby was born at 6:44 pm. Kept busy being a working mother of 3 children, one with Aspergers, renovating the original money pit and drinking too many coffees in the space of 24 hours. Misty, My husband left me, when I was in labor, to go buy a PS3 (it was Black Friday). Thank you TokenI think im in love with you! July 2015 Answer . vocabulary - "Was in labour" versus "went into labour" - English -Tifffany, My husband took so many pictures of himself in the scrubs and mask (obviously super important to document) the camera battery was almost dead when we actually had the baby! I woke up at 2 am when my water broke, shook my husband awake and told him. You notice a mucusy discharge or "bloody show". Finally, my Dad called the neighbors across the street to ask them to leave a note on the door of the house. Then he is hungry and is trying to make a sandwich and I inform him it is time to leave for the hospital. I waddle downstairs expecting everyone to be ready to leave and find them eating waffles and watching cartoons. My husband made the list! I told my husband in the morning that I had been in labor most of the night (he slept through it). Dear Amy: I am 63 and my husband (of six years) is 67. They might have difficulties controlling their emotions and be prone to anger or violent behavior when drunk. However, you can convince them to set certain limits to how much they should be drinking. 5 drinks a night sounds like a problem bigger than just worrying about having a sober ride to the hospital. The men or the women that married men like the ones referenced in the comments? My hubby is a talker, too. I push for over two hours and my daughter was born at 6:55 am. What happens if you have an emergency at home one night and your husband is drunk? My first child was early and I had a long hard 19 hour labor. Well, it was getting late, and his sister called to see how things were going, and he smiled affectionately at me and told her that the contractions werent too bad yet. Also, he decided at some point that the contraction monitor was a better gauge of my pain than I was: Oh, that one wasnt so bad. I nearly ripped his head off. At 4 weeks premature my water broke at 4am. He slept it off too long, that should be the only issue, nit that he ate. When my DH was starting up his business last year we were going through huge financial stress he would often have 2-3 beer over a day. So the end result was his own personal police escort to the hospital. Your rights as a patient supecedes his right to violate your peace and privacy. It concerned me, I spoke to him about it, and he stopped. When he got home, he dropped his phone in a stock pot that was soaking in the sink. However, if you are determined to recover from it and stay sober, you can do it as long as you stay strong and focused.